The Lou Gehrig of law enforcement, kind of…
New Jersey – A cop in New Jersey has surpassed and overtaken a record many thought would never be broken. Officer Danforth of Twin Lakes PD in New Jersey has just reached his 12 year anniversary hire date.
All on day shift.
Every single day.
“I really don’t think it’s a big deal,” said the humbled Danforth. “I just show up everyday and do my job,” he further explained.
We wanted to learn more about Officer Danforth and how he was able to achieve such an impressive feat.
It was discovered that, after graduating the police academy in 2005, he was assigned to day shift.
And that’s about it.
Somehow Danforth has avoided working night shift his entire career. Rumors have been swirling about how this could be.
One officer, who refused to give his name, heard that Danforth caught a high ranking staff officer
banging having relations with his wife.
Another theory given is that Danforth is a mole for internal affairs and isn’t actually a police officer.
The most outlandish rumor that surfaced is that Danforth has a rare mental condition called brightflashaphobia which is a fear of flashlights.
And yes we looked it up, it’s a real phobia.
“And yes, sometimes the guys tease me about not needing headlights for my patrol car,” panned Danforth. “Oh, and by the way, this rumor about some phobia is total bullcrap!”
Danforth isn’t the only cop in the country who has spent his entire career on day shift.
There seems to be a pattern that these officers follow that enables them to keep their flashlights in the box it came in from property and evidence.
The evidence suggests that these officers are masters at one crucial attribute that allows them to work in the sunshine.
They are kings at ass-kissing.
“That’s another lie,” blurted out Danforth. “Just because I bring my Lt. and Captain a mocha latte every morning from Starbucks has no bearing on my shift assignment,” Danforth said.
It was also discovered that many night shift officers were preparing to transfer to day shift in light of this story.
This could potentially end Danforth’s streak. We approached Danforth with this information which appeared to stun the 8 year career day shift officer.
Danforth, his lip quivering as he gathered his thoughts, took a deep breath before responding and said…
“I guess I’m being forced into a situation not of my choosing, so be it,” he said as he stormed out of the precinct building. “You son of a bitches, I’ll never work nights, EVER!”
The following day it was learned that Danforth had finally put in his transfer, possibly ending the coveted streak. But Danforth would not give up that easily on his promise from the previous day.
Danforth put in for and was selected for his new assignment.
School Resource Officer.