Millennial Cop Honored at Banquet for Big Case


A big case indeed

Carlsbad, California – To say it was a big case would be the understatement of the year. Detectives and officers were recognized for their hard work in clearing an international drug ring that operated out of the affluent California city.

The investigation and operation, called “Operation Gutter Ball” lasted almost two years that would eventually lead to multiple arrests and the seizure of a lot of narcotics.

The Chief of Police for Carlsbad PD, Chief Baker, was in attendance and couldn’t have been more proud of his officers and detectives who worked on the case.

“I couldn’t be more proud of the officers and detectives who worked on this case,” Chief Baker proudly professed.

Everyone involved in the investigation played a crucial role in taking down the ring that was starting to develop a strong hold in the area.

See Also: “Local Cop Arrested for Panhandling”

One of the officers recognized however had a few scratching their heads.

Officer Barry, who had only been on the department for 6 months, was recognized with the others during the presentation of plaques for the operation.

There was only one problem.

Officer Barry, from sources close to the investigation, had absolutely nothing to do with the case.

A millennial cop speaks out

“I felt like, you know, as a younger cop, I should speak out about the unfairness of not getting recognized for this operation,” explained Barry.

“Why should it matter that I wasn’t involved, I mean, we all work for the same team right?”

Officer Barry’s parents were also in attendance for the banquet in full support of their son.

“We support our son,” said Barry’s mom.

“This goes much deeper than a participation trophy,” asserted Barry’s mom.

Barry’s mom went on for several minutes about how wonderful her son, an only child, was and how they would talk about the case every morning (after she made him his favorite chocolate pancakes).

This was affirmed when Barry insisted on giving a speech upon receiving the award that night.

“Although I was not directly involved like the other officers and detectives in this case, there wasn’t a week that didn’t go by that I didn’t think about the case,” said Barry.

Barry’s mother did admit, however, that there was a stretch of a few weeks when Call of Duty Black Ops II initially came out. “Other than work, I didn’t see him for three weeks” she said. “I was so proud of him when he finally finished the campaign for that one.”

Barry accomplished this feat by calling in sick on more than one occasion his mother confirmed, despite carrying a zero sick leave balance.

A rising star

Chief Baker also came to the defense of Barry despite growing consternation from the other cops who actually did real work on the case.

“Do you really think it’s fair to suddenly not recognize those who have always gotten attention for things they have never accomplished or been successful at?” posed Chief Baker.

“I remember being that kid who had to watch his own brother win 5 bowling trophies one summer while I had to take the walk of shame with nothing,” pined the Chief.

“Thank god my mother intervened and pressured the junior bowling league into giving me a complimentary bowling pin”…

“It’s total bullcrap man, this guy didn’t do a damn thing in this case,” blurted out Officer Ortega while being restrained by the other cops who actually did work on the case.

One would have thought that Barry, after seeing such pressure from his peers, would renounce his award.

That didn’t happen.

Several weeks after the banquet, rumors started to spread that Barry had filed a complaint against his supervisors claiming a hostile work environment.

Many thought that it would be related to the ongoing hostility for accepting an award he should not have received.

And they would be wrong.

It appears that in a span of two weeks, not one boss told him how super terrific he was or publicly recognized him for coming to work.

Another rumor going around is that Barry made detective.

That rumor is true.

You can find other SATIRE articles like this one and more at The Salty Sarge Facebook Page.


  1. FACT CHECK: I live in Carlsbad, CA and work for San Diego PD and there has never been a Carlsbad Police Chief with that name you referenced. I also talked to officers who work for Carlsbad PD and they say this never happened. Are you sure you have the right city? There is a Carlsbad, New Mexico.

  2. Mark from the end of the story.
    You can find other SATIRE articles like this one and more at The Salty Sarge Facebook Page.

    Sharing is caring!

  3. Mark Bua seems as sharp as they come. Lol. Satire at its finest. I fear this is where our society is going. Although this story is for laughs and giggles, so much of it is mirrored in some way within our departments now days.

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